Friday, October 18, 2013

Concern for tumor progression

I am pleased to say that Brayden did well for the MRI, and he was in decent spirits for getting up at 5AM. His port was accessed in 1 stick (yay!) and the MRI began on time. We got home around 0930 and he went directly to bed after his bottle. He got up a little after 2 and ate some pancakes. He is pretty uncoordinated and is losing his balance frequently, and he is pretty frustrated by that, but I am assuming he will be his good old self after the sedation works its way out of his system. 
Our oncologist called just before Brayden got up and I am disappointed to share that it wasn't the news we had hoped for, but it wasn't the worst news we could have received either. The conversation began with him telling me that the tumor is measuring the same (whew!), but that the tumor looked "different" overall. Apparently the way the tumor takes up the contrast has changed quite a bit, causing it to take on a different appearance. The radiologist put in the report that the MRI shows "concern for tumor progression" (insert tears here). Dr G then explained that he doesn't necessarily agree, and he doesn't feel that there is significant enough evidence for progression to change Braydens current treatment regimen. He also explained that there is not enough evidence based research to say either way whether this is truly tumor progression or not. With all of that being said, we will continue down this path that we are on, hold our breath, keep praying for a miracle, and get another MRI in 3 months.
I am overwhelmed with emotion right now, and I can't help but think the worst no matter how much I try to stay positive. I was hoping for true stability so we could celebrate the holidays and Brayden's 2nd birthday without wondering whether he will still be with us for a 3rd birthday. Unfortunately we weren't that lucky, although I am extremely grateful that we weren't given worse news. We will view the images with Dr G on Tuesday which will hopefully calm my nerves (if that is possible).  Thanks to everyone who was thinking out Brayden and praying for us today, we could certainly feel the love!

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